You stayed up until 12:47 AM having the same argument you have had over and over. How do I know that? Because there always seems to be one partner who volunteers to be the time keeper. They keep track of what time it is throughout the discussion and announce how long the argument has been going on at different intervals so that the other partner is aware.
Maybe you were fighting about how one or both of you feel unheard and misunderstood by the other. Maybe you were fighting about the frequency or quality of your sex life. Maybe you disagree about parenting or one of you feels left out after having a child together. Regardless of the topic, you both spoke your mind. You both shared (maybe shouted) about how you felt. But, it didn’t go anywhere and nothing was resolved. You have such limited time together and all of that time seems to be spent fighting. Now, you’re just left exhausted and back to square one.
You are both feeling frustrated. While you don’t want to fight, you desperately want to be understood by the person you love most in this world.
You both secretly wish you could rewind time back to when you were in love and happy together. The love was there before. So, it must be possible to have that again. But, you have no idea how.
In order to get different results, we have to try something different.
You have a hard choice to make…
Choice 1: You can either continue going down this hard road and see how it all shakes out. Hopefully it will all turn around magically. ✨(Spoiler alert: this might just prolong your unhappiness.)
Choice 2: Or, you could try couples therapy and work towards a better connection.
If you are willing to try couples therapy, I would love the opportunity to work with you.
The Gottman Method is my main modality when working with couples. The Gottman Method offers practical solutions for couples to communicate more effectively and respectfully with each other. There are many skills and exercises I can share with you that have helped countless other couples work through similar struggles as you are experiencing.
Reach out today! I am here when you need me and I am looking forward to meeting you (and your partner).